I’ve accepted that I am dying: Now What?

Because too many folks do not plan for their passing prior to becoming ill or while they’re going through treatment for a disease, today I talk about the plans that are needed to be prepared once you realize you’re going to pass away soon. 

The emotional and sensitive part of the realization that you’re going to pass away is nothing anybody can be ready you for.  Even if you already knew it was going to happen eventually, it’s still a distressing shock.  Your mind fixates over little stuff, some important, mostly not important.  

Without knowing how terrible and sick you’ll feel, or how much time you’ve left, paralysis will become the devastating reaction.  How much and what can you accomplish in this situation?  With any luck, you have taken in a comforting care team or a hospital you have admitted into. 

If not, do something instantly.  This will make things easier and makes time to handle all other important stuff that entails you.

Precious stuff matter first, for the majority of us, that’d be our family and friends.  As Maya Angelou stated, *“I have learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”  

When you’re dying, the last stuff you may mull over is the way you made people feel.  On the other hand, your last memory is one they’ll carry forever, so express your emotions and love to your friends and family.

Consider making a video that shares your history, memories, and dreams for the future of your family.  It does not matter how terrible you look, it’s your voice that they’ll love hearing.  If that is not possible, write them letters. 

The “practical” things should be carried out next.  Make sure your monetary affairs are in place.  Check beneficiary names on all your life insurance policies and retirement plans.  Nothing is more awful than your surviving spouse knowing that your surviving ex-spouse is the recipient of your insurance policy.  Employ a fee-only financial planner so as to help understand how to organize any last ditch cleanups.

The two common fights happening – first are fights over stuff, second are fights over the funeral.  If you would like your family to get by following your death, attempt to deal with these two matters while you’re alive.

Get rid of or give away your own stuff while your brain is still working.  One of the greatest memories I have of my mother’s death was when we were seated around her bed with her holding a jewellery box.  She handed out every piece upon saw fit.  It is truly difficult to fight about such things while sitting in the presence of a dying individual you love. 


When she was over, she thought of secret hiding spots of other stuff, and from her bed, would instruct us where to locate these precious things.  It was like treasure hunting because my mom was one pack rat.  One find was a container filled with one or two $100 bills – she was in glee splitting all her casino earnings with us.

Plan your funeral!  In the previous summer, I appeared in 3 funerals in a short period of time.  One was a friend who was sick for a long time and fought to treat his sickness to his last day.  It was apparent that the funeral director knew nothing about the individual we all respected. 

In the following funeral, the first few hours were spent sharing anecdotes of our beloved pal, which was delightful.  Then the funeral director took advantage of an audience and campaign for over an hour to attempt to save our souls.  I had a feeling that my very irked dead friend would’ve not been happy about that.

The most incredible was the last funeral.  My dear friend had fought against ovarian cancer for numerous years.  When she admitted that nothing more could be fixed, she selflessly planned out every single detail of the celebration of her life.  It was remarkable.  We cried, we laughed, and we even danced. 

We cried, we laughed, and we even danced.  Following the service, she had an idea and wonderful celebration with her desired beverages and food and loads more stories were spoken.  She was a muse for many, both in death and in life.  We must all be the same.

Also, it would be the best time to talk with your lawyer about your deed. This is the time when you want to settle legal matters ahead and make sure everything is set before your passing.